Tuesday, January 17, 2012

In which ESB has a frank talk with her readers


Dear Everyone -- Casual readers and big ol fans and haters who claim not to be readers but seem to keep reading anyway,

I hoped I wouldn't have to write this post today, but. Let's get it out of the way once and for all.

YES. I have begun accepting sponsored posts from people I like who run businesses I want to promote. Businesses I know some (not all) of you will be way into supporting.*

And YES. I will fucking delete your comments if you are rude to my sponsors.

Hate on me all you want. Call me a bleeding cunt if you must.

But believe it or not, I'm running a business too.

xoxo,
ESB

Lemon centerpiece by SAUIPU
______________________________

*Of course ALL OF YOU won't approve of EVERY VENDOR I recommend. (Does every groom want a memento mori wedding band?)

66 comments:

  1. You gotta do what's right for your business. If your sponsored posts are just as nicely curated as the rest of your blog's content, then no one has any business complaining. Carry on, girl!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Can I blatantly suck up here to say: Thank you for streamlining my online shopping process?
    <3 Catbird, so much.

    Ok, then. Consider it done.

    ReplyDelete
  3. to state the obvious - no one has to read the sponsored posts, amirite? so if you are bothered by them - skip over. ESB has been upfront about what is sponsored and it's pretty easy to just ignore them, if you prefer... i don't know why the sponsor issue bothers people so much
    -sarah

    ReplyDelete
  4. Longtime Lurker here....

    I just had to jump out to say: well said. Well said, indeed.

    <3

    ReplyDelete
  5. As long as they're marked, I'm cool. I found my (awesome) photographer through a sponsored post on A Practical Wedding, so I'm all for this. Get that money!

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Bleeding Cunts" and "The Day I Sold Out."

    BAHAHAHA!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. now playing at a concert venue near you!

      Delete
  7. ah the internet and the ability to comment anonymously! not sure what happened yesterday (i assume a lot of the comments got deleted) but i think this post is a good reminder for people to check themselves before they click 'publish'.

    ReplyDelete
  8. This shit right here is precisely why I come back. Do what you gotta do, lady. Delete, delete, delete, the bitches be crazy regardless.

    ReplyDelete
  9. dear ESB. you are great. that's all.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I just unsubscribed from you. Why? Not because of your sponsored posts. Because of your tone. I used to love you, in fact, I have been a loyal reader for over a year, but lately your tone is making me feel depressed. You have stopped being funny and now your posts just seem... sad. I felt the need to tell you that I am leaving in hopes that you can turn it around for everyone else and go back to entertaining snark. It's a fine line between snark and cruelty. You used to walk it beautifully.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A year? Pfft, newbie.

      Delete
  11. Wow. Who knew a few Eames chairs could cause so much freakin' scandal?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Why do they get so offended? Can't one just stop reading a blog if one doesn't like it? Why does not liking a blog translate into hate and anger with the blogger? Just read something else, it is a big internet.

    oh wait.

    people get off on drama.

    ha

    ReplyDelete
  13. i don't see why anyone could possibly be offended! I read your blog partly because I like it when you get bitchy, but mostly because of your impeccable taste. I want to know what ESB likes, and I trust that you wouldn't accept sponsors that you didn't think were rad. Make that money girl, keep doing what you're doing!

    ReplyDelete
  14. What a bunch of Sensitive Susans. All the people who complain need to get over themselves.

    ReplyDelete
  15. xoxo

    We all have bills to pay, do what you have to do! They are probably jealous that nobody wants to sponsor their blog.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Dear ESB,

    I think you are just as childish as your anon posters. This post wasn't necessary - you stir up the drama because I think you believe it helps with readership.

    I've watched you lash back at your anon posters too many times. You like the controversy - don't post shit like this that presumes the opposite. It's fake.

    Sincerely,
    A former reader

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Former readers don't still read. "I think you are just as childish as your anon posters"? Sounds like someone loves the drama juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust as much :P

      Delete
    2. I agree and I expect this will be deleted. ESB post a post about how important expensive chairs are right after a post where she rolls her eyes at the idea that a venue matters. She set her sponsor up to fail and then deletes our posts. If this is about money ESB then get better at making it and have some respect from your sponsors!

      Delete
  17. Sometimes a post is not to my taste. What a bummer. I read something else.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Holy shitballs. I ignored my google reader for less than 48 hours and all this has gone down??
    For the record, can we not blame ESB for making money? Blame reaganomics or the current economic times, or even capitalism (if you pick the last one, let's be friends) for the creation and spread of sponsored posts on blogs which have a pretty large readership. The mordern life is about making money, amiright or amiright? Let's not be naive enough to think that blogs somehow circumvent that.

    ReplyDelete
  19. hm. I don't care a lot, and I think most of this is overblown... I mean... it's a blog. Right? But for what it's worth, I am finding the amount of arguing on this site to be much less enjoyable than the other things. I like the snarky posts, but the going back and forth with readers/other bloggers/between readers is kind of depressing and not very interesting. I really like the site, and I don't want to contribute to the poop throwing, but it would be cool if there was more content and less drama.

    Don't get me wrong, there's lots of good content still. It's just kind of lame to have to skim through this other nonsense.

    -L

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. and to be clear, by "other nonsense" I don't mean the ads. I think the ads are pretty reasonable.

      -L

      Delete
  20. I think there are ways of being sponsored that don't just straight-up abdicate authorship of the blog to someone who wants to sell your readers something. The ads are fine, the sponsorship (with full, and much-appreciated disclosure) is fine, but since your own responses to readers tend to be on the short side, you run the risk of losing authorial voice to other profiteering contributors.

    It would be great if you could find a middle ground - do an interview or two, and retain that ESB snark that people love. It feels more genuine, and less like you're shielding your sponsors from unruly (but honest) readers.

    ReplyDelete
  21. What the hell happened yesterday? Thank you, esb, for being both badass and sane.

    ReplyDelete
  22. May I sponsor a post that just says, "EFF, YES!"?

    ReplyDelete
  23. About fucking time you started deleting comments.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I just posted this comment the salt post, but thought that I'd better re-post on this one.
    ------

    does anyone else think anon is that bitter chick from the glitter drama who turned out to be a big ol' bigot?

    These rude anon posts started shortly after that and seem solely interested in being a bitch to esb

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I really hope Jordan Ferney has better things to do than anonymously troll smaller blogs on continuous loop.

      I doubt this theory.

      Delete
  25. Why wouldn't anyone be ok with sponsored posts? They're ususally not the most interesting content but we get advertising everywhere else and it's your blog/business after all...
    However, I think sponsored posts entail the responsibility to screen those sponsors, be transparent about them and at least make sure there is no (even slightly) false advertising.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Good for you for your blog being at a place where you can accept sponser AND pick and choose the ones you respect and want to support. Plus, we love your taste so ain´t no hatin´ going on here.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I was thinking the same thing as JB - all this blog drama seems to have cropped up after the glitter drama...

    ReplyDelete
  28. I agree that the anon posts were very rude, but i'm not surprised that it happened -- ESB trades on her straight-talking, no-nonsense editorial voice, and suddenly puts up a paid-for post that seems to advocate the exact opposite of what she's saying. But because it's a post, it's still perceived as her own 'voice,' now 'compromised' by money. Drama ensues, and some readers lose trust.

    Sure, it sounds silly when it's all about chairs and venues, but I think it's a little disingenuous to act like there's no reason for people to complain -- most 'high quality' publications (if there are any left) try to erect as many walls as possible between advertising and editorial, because of this very issue. Unless it's done very well and with a lot of communication and understanding on both sides (I think Meg at APW is a good example), mixing the two often demonstrates a lack of respect for the reader, and erodes at the trust of the publisher.

    I get that ESB's whole style is "i don't give a shit what you think," and "it's just a joke, get over it," but as ESB says, she's now running a business, and us readers are now her income source. So, i can see why some of them got angry when they thought they were being treated like idiots.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. call me conservative, but i feel mixing ads and editorial content always demonstrates a lack of respect for one's own voice. keep the sponsored posts guest-written and the walls high, team.

      Delete
    2. Thank you so much!!

      Delete
  29. HAZAA! I read your blog because you have great taste! Keep the rad sponsors coming...I really appreciate the tips.

    ReplyDelete
  30. I have no problem with sponsored posts. ESB, you introduced me to the amazing Catbird!! But yeah, I think how you do it makes all the difference.

    In any case, you're awesome ESB. Thanks for keeping me sane throughout this whole wedding planning process!

    ReplyDelete
  31. I have no problem with sponsored posts either...as long as they're not by Paula Dean or some other idiot. But you would never do that to us.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Yowza. Why would anyone call you a bleeding cunt? That's just rude. Personally, I don't care if you except sponsored posts. Nor do I think you have the moral high ground if you don't do sponsored posts.

    Lots of blogs I enjoy have sponsored posts, but here's a fair warning: I just don't read them. I pretty much skip right over them unless they sound particularly interesting.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Props for honesty.
    Why did the internet have to kill the golden rule,
    If you don't have anything nice to say, keep your damn trap shut.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I don't get it. You're mad that a commenter called out your sponsor on their false advertising? Don't you want accurate information on your blog?

    ReplyDelete
  35. I'm the ANON who posted the prices yesterday.

    Something to clear up: Not all of the ANONS from yesterday were the same. Some were straight up rude, attacking ESB personally, others, ME, called out the sponsored post author, Michael-the chair guy, on his false advertising. I called him out because 1) I appreciate honesty, and 2) calling things out is what happens on this blog, no? It was done WITHOUT being rude. It was factual. I used the same "Calling bullsh*t" expression that the sponsor used. Is that not okay? Is only the sponsor and ESB allowed to call bullsh*t?

    So, to restate, my issue was not with ESB, sponsored posts, or expensive cool ass chairs. I don't call people bleeding anything, and I realize your blog is your business. My comments were not deleted. I have been a long time reader and I'm leaving now because the energy here is really dark and this isn't the type of vibe I want as I approach my wedding. (No door slamming)

    Peace out and thanks for the salt. I freakin LOVE salt.

    ReplyDelete
  36. ESCANDALO! not really. esb i think you rule and a girls gotta eat! you remind me every day that my wedding doesnt have to be a cookie cutter nightmare and for that i thank you. if i want to pick a fight about chairs, i'm prob the crazy not you dearest. HATERS GONNA' HATE!

    ReplyDelete
  37. This shit is more entertaining than all those crazy bitches on The Bachelor.

    ReplyDelete
  38. "Bleeding cunt" is awful. I prefer heartier slurs such as "cuntbucket" or even "bucketcunt" if you're particularly cruel. You want your prey to be both insulted and confused.

    Also, I usually enjoy the sponsored posts, and at the times when I don't I think to myself, "I just surely do not care for this post no sir I do not," and then I get back to work.

    I understand that some people can't do that though because life is like really hard sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  39. I don't always agree with your advice, I don't always like your tone. I don't always like the posts you chose to make. But the one reason why I keep reading is because I like that you're just plain honest and upfront about everything people ask of you. It must be difficult to run an advice blog when people often send in asinine questions or leave dipshit remarks (I'm one of the dipshits sometimes so there you go)...

    Maybe I've been around the internet commenting block a few too many times, my snarky/trolling days are long over (for the most part) but I don't have to comment on every post just because I happen to agree/disagree with what you have to say. People are of course allowed to disagree with you, but there is a fine line between disagreeing and behaving like an asshole. I mean, no one is forcing anyone to comment or to read your posts, be it a polite response, or one left to your readers to answer, or where you give a not-so-becoming response. Nor is anyone forced to buy from your sponsors just because you post about them (and ffs, people will find out if anyone is overpriced on their own too). So IDGI, are people that dumb to not understand how you operate yet? Or the internet, in general? JFC, thank god people are taking their toys and leaving. I don't think ESB is ruining the fun part of her blog, it's everyone else who is.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Who gives a shit? No one else is gonna pay your bills. Can't wait to see the vendors you love I'm sure they are fabulous.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Wait, this is over the Eames chair party rentals? Dammnit! I wish I would have known about them BEFORE my wedding they were fucking amazing!

    ReplyDelete
  42. anon 10:09 and 10:10 has got to be the same person, amiright?

    esb wasn't attacking all anons, just the ones who were being downright rude and making personal attacks.

    ReplyDelete
  43. well said, if you don't like it don't read it but don't get all nasty about it.

    p.s - if you want to do weekly sponsored posts from catbird I'm fine with that.

    ReplyDelete