Dear ESB: Should I spend 5K on this dress?

I’m hoping that you will be able to help me out on this search. After trying on about 50 dresses and hating the way I look in almost all of them (big tush, hate poof, hate satin, no bows, no tulle) – I found this dress that I can’t stop thinking about. The photo is of me, because I can’t find this dress on the interwebs yet, and please excuse my bra peeking out.

I’d buy it tomorrow – but with tax/alterations/etc it’s around $4500. My incredible mother (who, along with my father, offered to pay for half of our wedding) wants to buy my dress for me as a present – and I just can’t ask her to spend almost $5K on this.

Again, there are no runway front-on photos, apparently it’s “too new” or something for Marchesa (me, jeans and t-shirt loving girl, in Marchesa, really?) but it is light, and flowy with a natural waist and very little embellishment, and the draping of the material, down the length of the dress makes me feel tall and that my huge butt is not quite as overwhelming – and also makes me feel really special and pretty and lovely. (It seems so simple, natural waist, sweetheart neck, romantic and light - but I'm just not seeing it out there!)

Do I just keep looking? Please help!

Thanks a million,
notgoodatshopping

*****

Marchesa Schmarchesa. You look great in that dress, but I damn sure wouldn't spend $4500 on it.

How bout this Liz Dye (for $1200)?

Silk shantung and English TULLE!!!

CAN YOU HELP ME FIND THIS DRESS?

Hi!!

So, hating the fact that I am writing in re: dress, as I have "accidentally" been following your blog pre engagement (lots of friends weddings to help plan!)

However, my amazing partner and I reside in a reasonably small town in Q, Australia and as such dress shopping for our special day is impossible. I have seen our local brides, as such am avoiding our one dress shop like the plague. Think strapless, diamante and satin ugh.

We are planning a small affair, something near the water, with much yummy food and celebrations to follow. We are totally cool on what we want our day to be and who to invite, (relaxed, intimate, flowers, friends, love, sunshine) my only issue is finding a dress.

I have attached two dresses that I adore (one via "the lane," one via your blog). I would absolutely LOVE your help in finding either one online (or by phone order o/s is fine) or something similar! I am Aus 10 (which I think is US 6???) and am 177cm tall, natural auburn curly haired (I plan on out with a small flower crown, or something to do with braids).

I have already scoured the internet to the best of my abilities and am coming up with nothing.... so any help would be amazing!!

the otherwise naked bride xox

*****

That Zac Posen will be hard to track down. (Both of those dresses will be hard to track down.)

Howzabout this killer number from Elizabeth Dye's brand new collection?

(Photo at top by Josie Miner)

Please help me dress my boobs (Part 4: Wedding Dresses)

Here's Celia with the cherry on top of our BOOB-O-riffic series:

So, you're getting married AND you have big tits... let's find you something awesome to wear. You guys, I have not been on a hunt for a wedding gown in about three years, but BY GOLLY it looks like the bridal industry knows what's up. It's a shame that you only seem to find big-busted brides in halter and strapless silhouettes, because there are hundreds, if not thousands, of dresses that are right for you. I had my dress custom made, which I highly recommend as an option, but I had so much fun doing the research for this post that I might just go try on some gowns sometime in the near future for shits and giggles. I really don't care how cuckoo bananas that is either.

Basically, all the same rules apply as dressing for non-wedding life. You want the right neckline, you want the right fabric, and you want the right cut that will help create balance. I know all those newer dresses coming out with all those fun embellishments on the bust line are oh-so-adorable, but you have no business wearing a big taffeta bow across your tits, OK? Other than that, like I said, the wedding gown world is your oyster, so let's explore it.

(left, right)

If wrap dresses look great on you for everyday life, then you better believe they'll work just as splendidly on your wedding day. I think really toned down silhouettes are so good for big boobs. Your knockers are such a great accessory, so you really don't need to be adding too much to them, you know? That being said, please do not let me catch you wearing a necklace that's long enough to fall between your cleavage. Como se dice, "looks really fucking stupid"?

I'm thinking backyard/potluck wedding for the dress on the left, and City hall wedding with your sister as the witness for the DVF dress. Am I right, or am I right?

(left and right)

Big boobs are awesome in all those romantic silhouettes. You'll look straight off the cover of some sex-a-fied romance novel, but in a good way. I know busty girls seem to be over empire dresses, but they DO work for you if that's a trend you're willing to take on. I wore an empire dress when I got married, but more than anything, I chose that style because I really wanted to EAT at my wedding. 

I saw at least five dresses on the Saja site that would be beautifully worn by a busty lady.

(left, right)

So, looking like a bride is simply not your thing, but you still want to look like THE bride. You lucky ladies have so much to choose from. If you're not planning on buying a wedding dress or even a wedding-y dress, just make sure you still choose something that will knock your socks off when you try it on. Personally, I don't believe in the concept of "The Dress," but if you're going to wear it for the most important day of your life, you better be in love with yourself in it. 

A great alternative to strapless and halter silhouettes are one-shoulder dresses. They compliment bigger boobs fabulously, and although *I've* never had luck with one of those convertible-type bras (I'm not saying they don't exist for big boobs), you can wear a one-shoulder dress with a strapless bra or bustier. Call me crazy, but I think adding even one strap to a dress when wearing a strapless bra helps add a fair amount of support. 

The dress on the right looks like it was MADE for humongous Big'uns. It's ultra sexy AND you can wear a regular bra with it? That's a major winner in my book. 

(left and right)

Alright, so you're getting married AND you have a hot body. Poor you. It's pretty safe to say that having a killer rack doesn't always equal a killer body. But if it does for you, then you've got to flaunt that shit, home chicken. I know I tried to sway you from strapless dresses, but let's say, for example, your figure is pin-up worthy (think Scarlett Johansson or Salma Hayek) and you want to show it off. Well then, you should! The Elizabeth Dye dress above will accentuate all your amazing curves, but will also keep you from looking like the Skank Bride of the Year. 

Thank you for having me, ESB and all her rad readers. This series has been tons of fun for me and I've gained so much knowledge in the process. Now lets keep our tits strapped in, and our wardrobes looking bangin'.

xo -Celia

Photo at top: Scarlett Johansson by Peter Lindbergh for Vogue China, April 2011 via Glamcheck

FUNTERNETS

a few things i've neglected to post/tweet while i've had my head up my own asshole for the past week or so:

- Rad + In Love. Two rad lady photographers I happen to know personally are joining forces and giving away a free wedding package. JUMP ON THAT.

- Elizabeth Dye's new dresses for 2012

- Digby + Iona's latest collection, Me + My Arrow (also avail at Catbird)

- "Second Chance" Herve Leger (via little winter bride)

- soup club. need i say more??

- oop! and i almost forgot: Design Tonic (the design blog/online mag that H + cevd designed together) is finally up and running. it's pretty great.

Photo of Jesse Jo Stark via Soph Mueller

what is it about blondes in WHITE PANTS?

I've got a menswear for women post coming up, but in the meantime I thought I'd torment you with this photo of Corinna & Julie.

One-of-a-kind dress by Elizabeth Dye + custom suit by Duchess.

(Photo by Evrim Icoz. See more from this wedding on Rock n Roll Bride.)

Many thanks to Christina, who will be doing the heavy lifting later.

HAIR WOES

Dear Eastsidebride,

I had been feeling quite smug and delighted with myself as wedding planning so far has been breezy but have come across a major stumbling block that I need your help with!!

Am wearing this dress by Elizabeth Dye in four weeks to my wedding. Fell in love with it instantly and as I'm a ballet dancer it just seemed like kismet that it was named Giselle. Shoes, rings, honeymoons, menus and even guest lists haven't been a problem but am recently starting to feel like the hair issue may get the better of me.

I have always had quite bold hair that just won't do what it's told. It's long and blonde-ish and resembles a lions mane and not in a cool way. It's pretty much the bane of my life! at work I leave it down, shove it up in a bun and generally ignore it but it's only starting to dawn on me now that I should figure out what the hell to do with it soon as there will be photos (ugh) and people looking at me (double ugh). My mom insists that I have to wear it up because otherwise it will ruin the line of the dress or some such nonsense. I do take her point though that I don't want to be at it all day trying to tame it. Basically I just want to know what to do with it so that I can tick it off my damn list and not have to think I have wonky hair on the day!

Things to consider

-not a fan of flowers/buns/hairbands on the side of the head. the lack of symmetry makes me feel lop-sided and a little disturbed.

-I have a fear of hairdressers so nothing too drastic (I know I know I did threaten to shave it!)

Please help me so that I can go back to feeling smug and practicing drinking champagne!

*****

Would you PRETTY PLEASE wear a big sexy ballerina bun on top of your head?

Martha Stewart endorsed the look months ago (and then of course what's-her-name tried to rock it on Project Runway) but I haven't seen a real bride knock it out of the park.

p.s. duh.

Portland is coming to San Francisco

ESB sponsor and all-around cool lady Elizabeth Dye will be in San Francisco on March 26th, along with her entire 2011 dress collection for you to try on and order.

Duchess will be there too, so why not drag your man [or your lady who wears suits]* along to try on a suit or two?

(More info here.) 

*I already felt uncomfortable about the heterosexism of my language when A Bicycle Built for Two pointed out that Duchess makes terrific suits for women "who prefer a masculine or androgynous look."

Fuck yellow shoes

Oct 18, 2010

Dear ESB-

I am getting married next June (woot) and have already purchased my dress (double woot, I was not looking forward to this part of the planning and it ended up being pain free. and fun). I love my dress. It is just what I was looking for: a simple shape in an interesting fabric. I have an hourglass figure so this 50's silhouette is usually what is most flattering on me. So now that I have the dress I have no clue what to do with it. Short dress means there is a lot of pressure on the shoes.

I attached 2 photos of the dress. I don't want to look prissy and sullen (image 1) or too indie vintage (image 2). I want to look effortless and hot. I want to look like a grownup but not like your mom. I want to wear yellow shoes. 

Any styling advice? I am not always the best at accessorizing. If your advice is get a new dress thanks for nothing.

kisses.

*****

Oct 20, 2010

I realize now I was a little defensive about my dress. I hadn't been reading your blog to know whether Elizabeth Dye was too "sweet" for your taste. However now that I have been reading through all your back posts (instead of working I might add) that you also love you some Liz. For serious though yellow shoes! I probably need to wait for spring to actually find something. I am just clueless on where to start in terms of style. hmph.

*****

Oct 21, 2010

I'm gonna put this in my pending folder and keep my eyes peeled for yellow when the spring shoes come out. There is shit-all available right now ;)

*****

Feb 10, 2011

Hey there-

I am revising my shoe help request from the fall. No yellow shoes. Fuck yellow shoes and matching my shoes to my invitations etc. I want neutral colored shoes that make my legs look long. Gray perhaps?

I am not being high maintenance and wearing 2 dresses. I am however being high maintenance and wearing 2 pairs of shoes.

Pair 1: Grown up shoes with some kind of heel. Nothing crazy with a 4 inch heel.

Pair 2: Flats I can dance all night in.

Any thoughts?

Also, loving that you post so much lately. fun.

***** 

Mkay, "effortless and hot" in a mid-heel is a little tricky. They can tend to look a little more "office-y and drab" (IMHO), especially in neutral shades.

How do you feel about red?

Or you could just wear these YELLOW REPETTOS all night long.* Totally hot.

*There is a dearth of yellow heels happening right now, (something to consider if you were counting on wearing yellow shoes with your wedding dress) but little yellow flats are starting to crop up.

Where can I find a gray wedding gown?

Dear ESB,

I am hoping to get a bit of help from you and your readers when it comes to wedding gown selection.

My fiancé and I have been engaged for two and a half years and we have an adorable two year old son together. We are so happy to finally be at a place in our relationship where we can make our commitment to one another official. Our wedding will be a small, around 50 people, January wedding and will include a religious ceremony followed by a restaurant dinner.

Our families both take tradition very seriously and I would prefer not to wear a white gown out of respect for others. Most wedding gowns have two color choices, ivory and white. What I am looking for is a long gray gown that is elegant, fashionable, and young.

My budget is about $2500.

*****

It turns out gray gowns are not easy to find. Even in the TWO THOUSAND DOLLAR RANGE. Who knew?

But. I wrote another letter to our lady Leanne Marshall and this time she answered! She said she'd be happy to make this lovely number in gray. In fact, she said "Gray seems to be the popular new 'it' color for wedding gowns."

Consider yourself ahead of the curve.

(You can message Leanne through etsy to discuss the dets.)

xo.
______________________________

p.s. Elizabeth Dye's Tempest also comes in pale grey. (I was trying to be consistent with the gray/grey thing but I just effed myself. Oh well.)

Elizabeth Dye for 2011

I'm digging Elizabeth Dye's new collection. It's boho chic meets 50's prom...

Via {frolic!}

p.s. It may appear that I am ignoring t-giving, but I'm just stoked that I don't have to cook anything. Happy happy everyone!!

non-j.crew alternatives for flower girls?

Nikki emailed me to ask for help with flower girl style. Here's her dilemma:

We are not having a traditional bridal party but decided that it would be fun to have my only niece participate as our flower girl. My wedding dress is a short number from Elizabeth Dye and so I want something equally sassy, sweet and fun for the flower girl (but not clone-like or anything). David's bridal makes me want to puke and I have tried a little etsy searching which only resulted in lots of tutus. I am hoping you have a non-j.crew alternative for me as I really do not even know where to begin.

As I've said before, I'm no expert on kids, so I brought in the big guns in on this one. A guest post from Chelsea of {frolic!} is up next. Chelsea always has a super sweet, easygoing vision of clothes for little girls (maybe because her three-year-old niece is so cool?)

Photo by Chelsea Fuss. Misha Lulu dress modeled by Millie.

Five wedding trends I'll never get tired of

Lately I've been harping on trends that drive me up the wall (let's face it, just the word trend drives me up the wall). So I decided it was time to step back and recognize a few wedding ideas that rock.

1. Photo booths. Whether you rent the classic or go with a modern update, people effing love to pose for pictures. And I for one wish I had more photos of my wedding guests.

(Image courtesy of The Flashdance's Smile Booth)

2. Mason jars. I love em for cocktails, florals, and especially votives. They have a fabulous rustic chic vibe, and they're amazingly photogenic. Leave the rings on to get an extra glimmer from your candles. (Jars of the non-mason variety are good too, and easier to collect.)

(Image source here)

3. Shrugs. The bigger and fluffier the better. Did Elizabeth Dye just hint that she's working on a shrug inspired by this one....?

(Image source here)

4. Creative catering. I am a sucker for a backyard barbecue. Or a wedding catered by a taco truck! How rad is this?

(Image found here)

5. What am I leaving out? Please submit your ideas! I'm getting very lonely listening to myself think.

witty wedding flats

.v's lust-worthy new Lanvins are making me think about pretty ballet flats again.

This pair is not cheap. But wouldn't they look fabulous peeking out from under a wedding dress?

And as Elizabeth Dye says, "If your shoes are perfect, you can wear a burlap sack. Put your dollars on your feet."

Lanvin flower ballet flat and many more at net-a-porter.com

speaking of fabulous necklines....

I dig this custom dress by Elizabeth Dye. More pics here.

fashion tip from Elizabeth Dye

If your shoes are perfect, you can wear a burlap sack. Put your dollars on your feet.
-Elizabeth Dye

Too good not to repost! More fashion tips from Elizabeth on {frolic!}

(Image from here)