Dear ESB: Want to keep running with the men's ring theme?

My fiancé is the WORST shopper ever, and I need help getting him to shop smart for a ring. He claims he doesn't care about things, but then is very picky when it comes to actually purchasing/wearing anything. He's the kind of guy that is perfectly content with a limited wardrobe, has to be convinced that yes he does actually need a dress coat, even if he'll only wear it twice a year, but will spend 3 months shoe shopping to replace the shoes he wears almost every day even though the ones he's currently wearing are so worn down they almost have holes in the sole.

He is convinced he will never get used to wearing a ring, that it's too bulky on his finger and he doesn't like jewelry. In the same discussion, he says he will wear his wedding band. He says he's not picky, but doesn't want to spend "a lot" of money on it. He works in food service management, so he uses his hands a lot, but he's not chopping things all day long. He gravitates towards rings in the 6mm size with more of a matte finish.

My dilemma is I know it's possible to get used to a ring, he doesn't yet believe that. I think the best plan of action is to get him a cheap ring now, let him get used to it and let it get beat up a bit and then I'll gift him a ring with nicer materials as his forever ring in a year or so when he's more comfortable wearing one. However, the cheaper rings all seem to be heavier and more bulky, which sorta throws a wrench in the idea that he'll get used to the ring. He also has slender fingers (size 7.5) so we haven't been to a store where he can try on rings and get a true idea of what they'll feel like.

He really liked this ring at Bario Neal in Palladium, but he thinks it's too expensive for "just a ring." 

I think he'll also like this Bittersweets ring from Catbird in a white gold. 

He'd like it Hammered, but I think down the road he'd be happy if it was just a traditional finish. If I was the one making the decision, I'd just get him one of these.

Any ideas of a good "temporary" ring I could get? Or a way to make him see the light and get something that's more likely to last and be comfortable now?

Thank you!

*****

This guy makes me REALLY TIRED.

Tell him it's his fucking WEDDING RING and he'll be wearing it EVERY DAY for THIRTY YEARS. For the palladium band or the thin band in white gold, that comes to approx 5 cents per day.

If he needs a training ring, tie a fucking twisty tie around his finger and make him wear it until the wedding.



Fuck's sake.

Iggy Pop by Pierre et Gilles via Room 26 via Vejde Gustafsson via Susannah

Alison's getting married

Did you know? Our TeenAngster is tying the knot!

I've been quietly eavesdropping on her wedding planning via twitter... okay, I'm not always quiet. sometimes I have to butt in.

Check out her AMAZEBALLS wedding band (above) scored on ebay!

And hellooooooooooo Memento Mori Ring for the hubs. (Bittersweets at Catbird)

I wasn't sold on the idea of a memorial ring, but I FUCKING LOVE this guy as a commitment ring.

A, pls to get it in the matching yellow gold, will you??

Dear ESB: I have wedding band issues.

I am getting married in August and have yet to decide on bands. I have a fantastic antique engagement ring that is similar to the one in this photo. I really, really love it - the stone is an heirloom from my fiance's great aunt, and the setting is circa 1915. The "filigree" or whatever its called is a little more geometric than the ring pictured, but I am not tech-savvy enough to attach a photo of my own ring, so, you know, this will have to do. 

Anyway, the problem is that I don't know what kind of wedding band to get.  I have tried on curved bands but they don't work because a) i hate them, and b) they make the ring look lopsided and take away from the cool shape of it. So, I'm at a loss. I really want a band, but they all look so weird with the ring. Is it ok not to have one? Can i get something simple and wear the engagement ring on my right hand? help! 

I also would ideally like my band and my future husband's band to be somewhat similar. Any suggestions there?

Sincerely,
Bandless?

*****

It is okay not to have a wedding band. It's okay to do WHATEVER YOU WANT.

But I love your simple-band-on-the-left-hand, fantastic-antique-on-the-right idea.

Re simple, matching bands: Catbird, Bario-Neal, Bittersweets New York (pictured above), Sarah Perlis and OK all have simple, beautiful bands that you can order in varying widths and weights and colors and finishes.

I happen to like a wide wedding band on a guy, in the same color + finish as his wife's more narrow band. In case you were asking me to get that specific.

Catbird Presents a selection of Baubles for Famous Lovers (part 2)

Serge Gainsbourg & Jane Birkin
With her thicket of chestnut hair and famous wicker baskets, Birkin took the the original jolie laid wolf by the ears. One night, the wolf Gainsbourg howled ferociously. Jane responded by flinging herself into the Seine. She was fished out by two policemen, and the most famous couple in France walked home, arm in arm, madly in love.
Digby & Iona Take The Wolf By The Ears Ring

Truman Capote & Jack Dunphy
Two writers, one as bright as the Northern Star, the other a bit more modest in scope, set out for Sicily, in a house once occupied by D.H. Lawrence. Thirty-six years later, as Capote lay dying, Jack was still by Truman's side, sort of. Not by Truman's side, were Paley, Radziwill, et al. - his estranged swans, the former intimates he had harpooned in his final, unfinished work, Answered Prayers.
Scosha Thou Shall Not Talk Shit Necklace

Marlene Dietrich & Edith Piaf
Dietrich hung her emerald-encrusted gold cross round the slender, stooped neck of La môme to ward away evil. Though Evil knocked on Edith's door regardless, the Little Sparrow and The Blonde Venus were the most devoted of friends for the rest of Piaf's short life. Dietrich was fiercely protective of her drug-addled, one-time lover; a journalist, knocking on Piaf's dressing room door was answered with Dietrich's inimitable voice, "Can I help you? I am Mademoiselle Piaf's maid!" He lobbed back, "How nice. Please say hello to Miss Piaf's chauffeur, Maurice Chevalier."
Digby & Iona Bird in Cage Necklace
Bittersweets Heart & Dagger Necklace
Yayoi Melting Love Ring

George Harrison & Pattie Boyd
He wrote "Something" for her, but something wasn't everything, and she left him for a Yardbird.  Before things went amiss, their love looked like beauty incarnate.
Elisa Solomon Ancienne Ring & Guitar Pick Necklace



You can find Baubles for Famous Lovers (part one) here. Thank you to Leigh and Rony!

p.s. This is not a sponsored post. It's just a love fest catbird and I have going. Can you blame us?

In Which Catbird Presents a selection of Baubles for Famous Lovers

Salvador Dali & Federico Garcia Lorca
Did they? Didn't they? Let the tongues wag. For Federico, a necklace vaguely in the form of Salvador's moustache, and for Salvador, a ruby ring in honor of Garcia Lorca's Blood Wedding.

Elizabeth Taylor & Richard Burton
Far be it for us to suggest a bauble for Mrs. White Diamonds herself. Rather, the decanter set from Love & Victory, makes for neat drinking, and easy glass hurling.

Clara Rockmore & Léon Theremin
Léon's muse, and unrequited love, played his namesake instrument, with grace, drama, and a perfect chignon of pitch black hair. Of making otherworldy music rise from a brass box outfitted with a rod and a ring she said, “You have to play with butterfly wings."
Bittersweets Black Diamond Twig Ring

Frida Kahlo & Diego Rivera
Love is true, love is trouble. She was pint-sized, he was not.  She was a painter, he was a painter. He loved ladies, she loved ladies. Twice-married, they brawled, battled, left and came together again in a blue house in Coyoacán.
Elisa Solomon Ombre Ring

Bob Dylan & Suze Rotolo
You sweethearts! You young romantics! You read Rimbaud in the park, and rambled round the streets of Greenwich village. The world was your oyster.
Carla Caruso Willow Ring

a heart necklace I can get behind

I have a confession to make. I hate the ubiquitous Tiffany heart necklace almost as much as I hate the ubiquitous Tiffany engagement ring. I guess I hate anything that's everywhere. But you knew that about me.

Anyhoo, this Dainty Heart Necklace by Bittersweets NY, this I can get behind. At catbird. Where else?

You might also enjoy the Tree Trunk Ring by Digby & Iona, which can be customized with an engraved heart. Featured today on Refinery 29.

Bittersweets NY on NOTCOT

Visit NOTCOT for a glimpse into the Bittersweets studio, and register to win a 14K Gold Twig Band.

I know... I've been obsessed with rings lately. Sue me.

for the true blood bride and groom

A pair of interlocking baby vamp rings from Bittersweets NY. I'm kind of geeking out about how romantic that is.

For bridesmaids who don't fit the mold

Coffee Bean and Match Necklaces by OathNYC. Heart & Dagger Necklace by Bittersweets New York.

I'd be thrilled to get any of these for Valentine's day. (But a handmade card will be even better.)