A bride in search of a dilemma

Feb 20, 2013

Hey ESB,

We're planning a laid back, court house ceremony followed by a party in a pub later in the evening. I bought this dress which fits like a dream and is super flattering. I thought the hard part was over but now I have to accessorise which is not my strong suit.

I have the kind of fair skin that suits all hair colours, so I'm kicking around the idea of deep wine lipstick (maybe just for the reception so I'm not smearing lippy all over the groom during the ceremony) and dark nail polish. Would dark shoes make it all too matchy? I'm thinking flowers aren't even really necessary and the thought of putting something on my head is sending me over the edge.

Am I completely insane going down the dark lipstick/accessory route? I have a hard time picturing it all working together with the dress. To be honest I'm having a hard time picturing anything other than the stock standard nude pump, peonies, french manicure look. But I mean, YAWN, right!? 

Thanks

*****

Jul 12, 2013

Are you MARRIED? How did you accessorize??

Dress is gorg, b/t/w

*****

Jul 12, 2013

Thanks esb - I think so too.

Not married yet, shit gets real in October.

I wasn't too long engaged when I emailed you and I was feeling pretty overwhelmed by all the choices. In fact, I was kind of projecting my stress about some significant life challenges by obsessing over wedding details. Don't think I'm the only bride to be to do that.

Things have a way of sorting themselves out though. I'm more or less organised with plenty of time to change my mind.

I've put a pretty vague order in with a florist that I drove past and loved the store set up (think fluro macrame hanging baskets with ferns etc). I've asked for a small bouquet that's wild and textural.

Accessories wise I bought these Emerson Fry shoes (they're gorg) and have put an order in for this amazing baby soft black leather jacket made by a local Melbourne designer. Oh and my wedding band arrived last week and I LOVE IT. I've spent a lot more money on accessories than on the dress but they're all pieces that I'll wear again (and again, and again). 

I've nixed the dark lipstick idea because I don't want to be worried all day/night that it's smudged, or worn off, or is on my teeth. And I don't want to discourage my new husband from kissing me for fear of my lipstick transferring itself to his face.

Besides that I'm pretty undecided about all the rest. I have a beautiful string of pearls my Dad bought me for my 21st that suit the neckline of the dress, and I was thinking of whacking some flowers in my hair like this (sorry no source, it's one of those frustrating pinterest/tumblr ones). Nails - no idea.

I'm open to suggestions if you or your readers feel up to completing the picture!

PS: We're taking our ceremony peeps out to lunch at the restaurant where we had our first date and it just so happens to be Chinese a la Shane and Eric. I love everything about that wedding and hope ours is just as fun...

*****

Jul 19, 2013

OK esb, I have a legit dilemma for you now. 

Last night, bridesmaid dress shopping, I found a dress [pictured above]. I know I wasn't really doing myself any favours but I had to try it on, and as suspected from looking at it on the rack it's absolutely gorgeous. It fits beautifully and suits my complexion and hair colour to a tee.

I can't justify spending $650 on a dress with no occasion to wear it, and it would make a KILLER wedding dress. But as you know, I already have an outfit sorted. 

It doesn't fit into any kind of budget I'm running right now, but that's what credit cards are for, right?!

I know I'm not the first to have the two dresses dilemma. I've canvassed my bridesmaids who've seen me in both dresses for their opinion but thought I'd throw to you also. Because, you know, guru.

Should I go with the new dress or stick to what I have planned? 

*****

For a courthouse wedding + Chinese + pub, I say stick to the shift dress.

p.s. You have bridesmaids for a courthouse wedding??

p.p.s. CHILLAX.

Colorado Wedding Guest Attire: THE VOTE!

I pored over your contest entries last night (PORED), and it wasn't too hard to narrow it down. My basic criteria were: a) Do I like the dress? and then b) Do those shoes go with the dress?

Here are the five ensembles I'm recommending for our Colorado wedding guest, four out of five of which feature BOOTIES. 

What can I say? I'm not a big fan of espadrilles.

from Emily (pictured above): Michael Angel Sleeveless Peplum Dress, Zara Leather Jacket, Charles Albert Obsidian Arrowhead Ring + Rachel Comey Ankle Boots

from beeprint: Antik Batik Mini Dress for some sparkle and falltime colors, Veda Avery Leather Jacket, kh:W earrings because they are subtle but badass + Rachel Comey Tux Boots because they are amazing.

from marisa, the i might get mauled by a bear (or hit on by an elk) but i will look damn good doing it outfit: Acne Moreau Crepe Dress, Matthew Williamson Mongolian Vest + Boutique 9 Wedges.

from Abbey: Burning Torch Ikat Dress, Leslie Shershow Antler Necklace + Rachel Comey Huron Boots

from buttercup133: Funktional Tunnel Dress, A Peace Treaty Yaluc Earrings, Club Monaco Adele Parachute Parka, Geometrical Illusion Printed Leather Pouch + Loeffler Randall Ollie Open Toe Booties

Cast your vote quickly! I'm shutting her down when we hit 500.

Note: As usual, I included no chalk/blush/white dresses, even though a startling number of you suggested them. If it's a color the bride might wear (especially at a casual wedding) it is not appropriate for a guest, mkay?

our big day (from 17beats)

Greetings from your resident cranky-pants and kill-joy, 17beats !!!

You've been getting a lot of emails from women hemming and hawing about eloping ... or questioning if they should just scrap their over-the-top wedding plans and retreat to Vegas. Here's our story (and a bunch of pictures) about the wedding that we thought would never happen.

The whole event was almost completely spontaneous, which truth be told, is very US. It wasn't until 36 hours prior that I even contemplated getting a dress; I just figured I'd wear something I already owned. After lunch with a good friend, though, I picked out this little number on a whim. It was somehow flattering (a marvel when you're 4 months pregnant) and seemed like it could be worn again. Everything else -- the bracelet, the ring, the earrings, the clutch -- was part of my hoard of sparklies. I had planned on wearing some brown pumps, but switched to black that morning, as it was chilly and I needed to wear a jacket.

The entire day was easy-breezy. No hoopla whatsoever! D's best friend was the witness and the photographer -- we called him the night before. I am lucky enough to be friends with a florist, so the bouquet & corsage literally appeared on our doorman's desk that morning (such a lovely gift from a dear lady).

We got an early start, and bounced over to City Hall and did the deed IN UNDER TWENTY MINUTES, and then headed uptown to buy rings. The sales woman was over-the-moon excited for us -- apparently we were the first newlyweds she'd ever helped (in 25 years) and she just LOVED our "story." We celebrated with a divine lunch at the Modern, and a leisurely stroll through MoMA, something we never seem to have the time for. That was the whole idea of the day -- to have the date we always promise each other, but never do because of work/crowds/etc.

We came home and D surprised me with a "Happy Birthday and Wedding" cake from my favorite straight-out-of-1960 Italian bakery. It was filled with chocolate pudding and cannoli cream and was absolutely delicious. It actually said "Happy Birthday and Wedding" on the top in perfect florescent pink jelly-icing script, which I found endlessly amusing. (I think I forgot to mention that it happened to be my 30th birthday, and the day before the world was supposed to end... HA.) After some cake, we slow danced to Lou Reed's "Perfect Day" and I sobbed like the sentimental sap I evidently am.

But that's because it was a Perfect Day. People fawned over us and went out of their way to be kind. There were "Mazel Tovs," "Best Wishes," and handshakes at every turn. Without a reservation, we somehow scored a table at the restaurant in under a minute. Countless tourists took our photos, and ladies-who-lunch toasted us with champagne. A little girl told us we looked like a prince and a princess, and a security guard cracked Will and Kate jokes. Even though we wanted the day to be completely private and JUST BETWEEN US, we ended up sharing it with all of New York. It was magnificent.

I am overwhelmed with joy that you sent me these photos.

I love them love them love them. And I love your story. It's just what I needed to hear on September 12, 2011.

A non-froofy Disneyworld wedding

Okay, ESB! Our beyond awesometastic photographer finally blogged our DisneyWorld, non-princess-and-puffy-tulle-dress wedding.

It was thanks to you that I had a last minute, beyond awesome coverup for my dress (a brown leather jacket from Fossil). My purple dress was also last minute; I'd had a cream-colored, floorlength JCrew (ahem) dress in the closet for several months. I woke up one day and realized that I hated it. So, with the help of my fiance (who did not actually see me in the dress until the wedding day), I found a purple dress online at Nordstrom. It was totally me. And yes, I wore tights. It's my thing in real life (dress, tights, and boots), so I thought, why the hell not? And I wore my great-grandmother's pearls with a hair clip from Etsy. My glasses were on my face because I can't see without them. No contact lenses for me in real life, so again, glasses it was on the wedding day.

We went about planning our wedding as a "let's just pick individual elements that we love and hope it comes together" way. At one point I had an idea board, and then I realized that our wedding was not a photo shoot (thanks again to you), and just started to roll with single decisions. The folks at DisneyWorld made it all happen. We aren't cool, indie, hippie people who look like they walked out of a Todd Selby photo. We are just us. So we went with that.

We had a billion colorful balloons because Casey proposed to me on a trip to the International Hot Air Balloon Festival, donuts instead of a cake after we realized we don't even like cake, confetti cannons just because they are fun, and we drove away in a bicycle rickshaw that we pedaled ourselves because I hate limos and paying a thousand bucks for a vintage car that would take us around the parking lot was beyond ridiculous. Oh, and we were married on a Monday morning, which just happened to be Valentine's Day. Note the stark lack of lace and red hearts. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Our reception was outdoors, with a guitarist playing in the background, and we had a silhouette artist make silhouettes of our guests. Those were the favors. No DJ, no dancing. Just talking and beautiful weather and awesomely awkward family interaction and Jonathan Canlas, my favorite photographer in the world, capturing it all. [See more photos here.]

Our wedding day was better than I could have imagined. It was us, in every single way. It wasn't diy, or indie (does it get less indie than DisneyWorld?), but fuck that. My only advice to anyone getting married is to go with your instincts. Do what you want. Just because it's tradition doesn't mean it has to be in your wedding. And if you want to wear a colorful dress or even pants, then do that. I felt like a bride because I was *getting married* to my favorite person in the world, not because of my dress.

My husband and I both love your blog and irreverence. Keep it up, ESB.

-Jessica (one half of chesapeake and caseyfriday, aka the irritating Couple Who Comment on your blog)

I have just one thing to add: Jessica, you so ARE cool.

Ivy & Aster read ESB

Obv.

They also apparently give a shit about the royal wedding??

Whatevers. Check out the new collection here.

(Thank you, Jessica, for the heads up.)

Girl (You know it's true)

I'm digging this Girl by Band of Outsiders Froissè silk dress, even though "partially lined interior" should read: DEFINITELY REQUIRES A CAMISOLE.

Did they airbrush out the nipples, or what?

Via DailyCandy's Wedding Dress Roundup
______________________________

HEY DAILYCANDY WEDDING PPL, I'm not offended that you left me off your "favorite bloggers" list, even though you clearly scoured esb for dress ideas. Tots. Not. Offended.

Speaking of leather jackets....

I dig this brown one.

Dorothea Barth Jorgensen photographed by Vanessa Jackman

(via Sara Williams)

Dear ESB: I hate frills

After much stress and tantrums, I have finally found a wedding dress. I *really* didn't want a strapless dress, but that's what I've ended up with. (I love my dress). But now, because it's strapless, I need something to wear to cover my shoulders for the ceremony (non negotiable, no bare shoulders). A little jacket or something. But I kinda hate all the bolero jackets around for wedding dresses. The all seem to be frilly or lacy or have huge flowers on them. My dress is plain, modern and simple. Because that's what I like. I look stupid in anything too girly anyway.

Got any ideas?

kisses from the UK

*****

Obviously, you should wear a leather jacket.

This Alice by Temperley is a great version of the classic motorcycle jacket.

For wearing with a wedding dress, I also like the Roberta Jacket from What Goes Around Comes Around, but I can't promise they'll ship to the UK.

(Thanks are due to cevd and kidchamp, who leapt right in when I tweeted, "Where should I shop for a leather jacket?")