speaking of H&M...

These slim-fit suits from the Conscious Exclusive collection look pretty good.

Apparently H&M now has e-commerce in the UK? But if you're in the good old US of A you'll have to line up on April 4.

Men's Fashion HELP

[I made a graphic to go here but then I decided it was too hideous]

Dear ESB,

I am getting married this October in an outdoor wedding at my parents' home in VA. The guys in the wedding party will be wearing this bowtie and these socks with charcoal dress pants, a white button down, and brown oxfords.

I love the look of a cardigan with this combination of items, and I have been scouring the internet for a cardigan in something close to that shade of light purple in both the socks and tie. 

I am having zero luck finding something that will work....any ideas?

*****

OMIGOD THEY'RE GROOMSMEN, NOT LOLLIPOPS

No purple cardigan. Do you read me? No. Purple. Cardigan. Also: No striped socks. Boy am I glad you emailed. I feel like we really dodged a bullet here.

Dear ESB: Want to keep running with the men's ring theme?

My fiancé is the WORST shopper ever, and I need help getting him to shop smart for a ring. He claims he doesn't care about things, but then is very picky when it comes to actually purchasing/wearing anything. He's the kind of guy that is perfectly content with a limited wardrobe, has to be convinced that yes he does actually need a dress coat, even if he'll only wear it twice a year, but will spend 3 months shoe shopping to replace the shoes he wears almost every day even though the ones he's currently wearing are so worn down they almost have holes in the sole.

He is convinced he will never get used to wearing a ring, that it's too bulky on his finger and he doesn't like jewelry. In the same discussion, he says he will wear his wedding band. He says he's not picky, but doesn't want to spend "a lot" of money on it. He works in food service management, so he uses his hands a lot, but he's not chopping things all day long. He gravitates towards rings in the 6mm size with more of a matte finish.

My dilemma is I know it's possible to get used to a ring, he doesn't yet believe that. I think the best plan of action is to get him a cheap ring now, let him get used to it and let it get beat up a bit and then I'll gift him a ring with nicer materials as his forever ring in a year or so when he's more comfortable wearing one. However, the cheaper rings all seem to be heavier and more bulky, which sorta throws a wrench in the idea that he'll get used to the ring. He also has slender fingers (size 7.5) so we haven't been to a store where he can try on rings and get a true idea of what they'll feel like.

He really liked this ring at Bario Neal in Palladium, but he thinks it's too expensive for "just a ring." 

I think he'll also like this Bittersweets ring from Catbird in a white gold. 

He'd like it Hammered, but I think down the road he'd be happy if it was just a traditional finish. If I was the one making the decision, I'd just get him one of these.

Any ideas of a good "temporary" ring I could get? Or a way to make him see the light and get something that's more likely to last and be comfortable now?

Thank you!

*****

This guy makes me REALLY TIRED.

Tell him it's his fucking WEDDING RING and he'll be wearing it EVERY DAY for THIRTY YEARS. For the palladium band or the thin band in white gold, that comes to approx 5 cents per day.

If he needs a training ring, tie a fucking twisty tie around his finger and make him wear it until the wedding.



Fuck's sake.

Iggy Pop by Pierre et Gilles via Room 26 via Vejde Gustafsson via Susannah

Seeking: A black wedding band for the groom

I found my ring on your blog (thank god I was prepared and had been reading you for fashion reasons) but need help with my groom. I've searched in vain - we/he'd prefer a solid black ring, circle or square, preferably no shiny metals or jewels (eww).

We're not trying to match or anything obviously. Can you help?

Worshipfully,
snobby fashion bride

*****

Guess what, snobby? I think black wedding bands are eew.

They're almost all made of tungsten or titanium, which a) EEW, and b) Who is this guy, SUPERMAN? He doesn't need a ring that is HARDER THAN STEEL. What happens if he gets it caught on something? Or they need to cut it off in the ER??

Allow me to recommend Macha's Ragged Wedding Band in yellow gold.

It wouldn't kill you to match just a *little*

Alternatively, you could try to convince Bernice to bring back the Misshapen Men's Ring in oxidised sterling silver.

I hesitated to recommend silver. Not sure it will hold up to 30+ years of daily wear. But this is a sexy, sexy ring, and (obvs) you won't have to worry about it tarnishing.

Seeking: An engagement watch for my BF

Hi esb! 

My bf of 9 years and I are planning to get engaged. We're not pre-engaged -- because what the hell does that even mean -- but we're looking at rings and talking about dates, etc. I'd really like to also give him something to commemorate the moment, but I'm stumped. Do you and/or your readers have any suggestions? 

He does like watches, so I was considering getting him a really nice one, but as a non-watch person I don't even know where to turn for a well-designed watch for a stylish gentleman. I'm also definitely open to any non-watch suggestions. My budget is around $1200. 

*****

I know shitall about watches, so I figured I'd ask Samuel Voerenbach (formerly of Martin Patrick 3, currently taking over NYC).

His answer was more vehement that I expected.... But also helpful. Vehement, and then helpful.

Here's Sam:

Wtf is pre-engaged? I keep seeing this get mentioned on your site and it drives me crazy. You've got a boyfriend -- hooray.

Anyway, I've got a pretty big disclaimer that is going to make me sound like a hater. Perhaps I'm just too traditional, but I don't think I like the idea of giving your boyfriend a gift when he proposes. Believe it or not most guys actually like giving things to their girlfriend/fiancée/whatever. It makes us feel responsible and makes us feel like providers and it makes us feel like we have a purpose and a person we're taking care of. To steal that thunder away from us by turning the whole situation around seems unnecessary given that he's about to do the most important symbolic thing in his entire life.

So all that said if you are looking at watches that can be somewhat wedding or engagement appropriate, for $1200 there are a couple different options. I'm going to make the assumption that because it's for a fairly important event you're looking at things that are maybe not quite formal but are still quite elegant overall. I would avoid anything with too many sporty functions like chronograph and stick with watches that are fairly simple-looking. 

The two that come to mind right away are really anything from Longines or the Max Bill watch, which in the US you can get from Amieco.

(Max Bill Stainless Steel Watch from Amieco, $830)

The other thing you could do is look for used watches that are of a little bit higher provenance. This might still stretch your budget a little bit but most nice jewelry stores carry a small selection. Nicer antique stores, auction houses and eBay are also good places to look. If that were the case I would look for something like a Cartier Tank (which would be perfect for what you're looking for since it's such a classic style), the slim group from Ralph Lauren or my personal favorite Hermes Cape Cod.

(Vintage Hermes Cape Cod, $1600 on ebay) 

Hope that helps!

At top: Jewelry designer Philip Crangi photographed by Ben Watts sporting his own Hermes Cape Cod via The Dandy Project via GQ

Rachel Comey for the groom

Naurns says these shoes are Rachel Comey.

Let's have Rachel Comey for all the grooms!

(Those bone boots are 50% off, so GET ON EM.)

YAY! And: Yes.

Headpiece by BHLDN but I don't even care because she's rocking it.

Grooms' shoes by I don't even know but they are AWESOME.

(Go check out the rest of the photos by one love photo and get all the dets on brides.com)

amazeballs wedding tie!

M. Dash got married (again) and she sent me these photos of  *CORRECTION*: his tie from General Knot & Co. in action.

My bad. Sometimes I forget that Pierrepont Hicks is not the only tie company in the world.

p.s. The pics from M's first lil Korean courthouse wedding are over here.

Pierrepont Hicks FW 2012 + A Giveaway!

**closed**

In honor of H and my fourth anniversary (FOURTH ANNIVERSARY!) @mrsphicks offered me this amazeballs Spider tie to give away to one lucky reader.

Okay, so maybe the giveaway actually has nothing to do with our anniversary. Maybe Katherine just wanted to show off the new collection.

Anyhoo.

Leave a comment below (why you like ties, or why you like men in ties, or why you like women in ties, or just "Pick me!") by 12pm PST on Aug 20 and I'll select a winner at random.

Another Public Service Announcement

I am sick sick sick of grooms who neglect to hem their pants. [Update: I deleted the link to the poor guy whose pants needed hemming. Endeavoring not to be an asshole.]

Photo by Rad + In Love

Color Block Tie

Pink Chambray + Indigo Twill Necktie from General Knot & Co.

I dig it.

(via Kate @ Wit + Delight via Jonathan Lo)

We interrupt #weddinghorrorstory(week) to bring you....

Bridal accessories from Metier.

I'm in SF as we speak shooting this lil movie. If only I had time to stop in and PAW THE SHINY THINGS.

I'd also love to see this Philip Crangi Men's Hammered Steel Band (with 24K gold lining!) in the flesh.

There's been a request for GROOM STYLE

According to my man Samuel Fehrenbach, this Ami Wool Tuxedo Jacket is all you need.

Oh, and maybe this little bit of advice from Tom Ford...

"Keep your jacket buttoned. Always. It's just really flattering—it will take pounds off you."

Courtesy of The GQ 100

FLOWERS ARE MANLY, DAMMIT

Darling dearest ESB.

My man (a once-flower farmer, which is kinda hot, right?) wants a floral wedding band. This comes with two primary problems: 1. He is embarrassed to tell a salesperson that he wants a "girly" ring, and 2. His options are, well, girly. We've tried to think of synonyms for floral (think "filigree" and "viney"), but to no avail.

Interweb searches have generated some promising results, but the dude is picky (obvs--he chose me) and wants to (understandably) hold the ring in his hands/try it on before he buys. He's not really into the whole roughly hewn organic thing, and wants a more traditional-looking ring...with flowers. Oh, and we're ideally looking for something < $300...of course.

Does anything cheap/classy/manly/floral come to mind? Or can you at least think of better buzz words for a salesperson?

Thanks!
Flower Power

*****

He's shy AND picky AND cheap AND he refuses to use the internetz???

THAT'S WHAT THE INTERNETZ ARE FOR.




p.s. I found that shit on etsy. You're welcome.

Help me pick a DJ! QUICK!!

Hi ESB,

I need to decide on a dj fast (this week). I had no idea they booked up so far in advance. I don't go hear djs at bars very often period, and I certainly have no experience hiring wedding djs. Having been together for several years, we feel already married, and in many ways we see our wedding almost as an excuse for a big outdoor dance party. So the dj is important.

My options:

1) A friend/acquaintance who I have heard is a great wedding dj. I have heard him dj before, though it was years ago, and he has great taste in music, obvious audiophile, sweet smart guy, etc, but he's like a stoner drug dealer dude who is questionably reliable. What if he doesn't show up? What if he gets mono the week before the wedding? He is the cheapest option.

2) A wedding dj from a pretty cool event dj company. They seem to "get" our non-mainstream musical taste, and won't do cheesy shit, but who knows? Basically they assign a dj a few weeks before the wedding and we talk to that dj to decide on music and he or she plays what we want, plus a little creative input. My fiance likes this idea because we would actually have more control of exactly what music the dj played -- less dj ego involved. I like it because we have a contract, which means someone will dj our wedding no matter what. But, we don't choose our dj, so it feels a little like a crap shoot. A lame dj would be the lamest thing we could do to our wedding.

3) Our friends out of state throw an awesome dance party that people line up around the block to get into. They could bring one of their djs to the wedding. That dj would be awesome, but very expensive, and I imagine we would have very little input as to what he/she would play. However, this dj would get the party started for sure. Again though: drugs, party monsters, bohemian, will he catch the plane and show up in one piece? Who knows.

I know this is ultimately a personal choice, but maybe as someone who has actually hired a dj before you could offer some advice? Or one of your readers?

Thanks!
DJ Challenged

*****

To recap, your options are:

1) questionably reliable

2) pretty cool

3) awesome

Am I missing something?? I mean, you did just describe your wedding as "an excuse for a big outdoor dance party."

Book the out-of-state badasses and CALM DOWN, LADYPANTS.

Sure, some DJs do a lot of drugs, but just as many of them are huge coffee drinkers.

Christian Brylle by Henrik Bülow for Dansk via The Fashionisto

Badass California Mountain Wedding

Jamie asked me if I would do the honor of featuring one of Rad + In Love's very first wedding shoots, and when I saw that there was a HORSE MASK involved, I was like, "Yeah, okay. Twist my arm."

Here's what the adorable Katie had to say about her wedding:

Jeremy and I got married on a grey November day in our hometown of Santa Ynez, California. We rented out the Figueroa Mountain Farmhouse for several days before the wedding and had our wedding party stay with us. In the evenings we drank wine and our friends played music while the wind whipped through the mountain range and the rain pelted the window panes. During the days, it was a circus of planning, cooking, crafting, and, in general, TCB-ing.

We already felt pretty damn lucky having such talented friends helping us out but then when we won the awesome Rad + In Love ladies, well, we felt like our wedding was totally charmed.

As our guests arrived, a friend strolled around the farmhouse, playing songs on his banjo, which set the mood perfectly. Moments before the ceremony, when there was an issue with the sound equipment and we couldn’t play our processional song, he stepped in and provided some sweet music as we all headed down the aisle. It turned out way better than we ever could have planned.

Jeremy’s friend (and his best man’s father) was our officiator and I think you’d be pretty hard pressed to find a more bad-ass looking Reverend.  After presenting us as husband and wife, he picked up a guitar and sang Darlin’ Companion by The Lovin’ Spoonful while we walked back down the aisle.

My dress was made by my incredibly talented friend Nichole Lumpkin who – I should add- created my dream dress in just two weeks leading up the wedding date after I, in true procrastinator fashion, freaked out about not finding anything I liked. 

My bridesmaid Molly, from Ballard Canyon Farms, began growing the flowers pretty much as soon as I told her Jeremy had proposed. She used plants native to Figueroa Mountain and created the bouquets, gorgeous floral arrangements, and my flower crown (and a teeny tiny crown for our cake topper girl). I called upon my stylist friends for makeup and hair, asking for a 60’s country vibe, and they knocked it out of the park.

We didn’t want a super matchy-matchy look for our wedding party so Jeremy’s boys all wore different Rockmount shirts and my girls ran with the suggestion of something, “floral and folky.” 

When Jeremy and I booked the farmhouse 8-months prior we knew there might be a chance of rain but we basically lived in denial of it until a week before when every weather website said, “It is going to rain on your wedding day,” and our friends texted us, “It is going to rain on your wedding day,” and our day-of-planner emailed us, “It is going to rain on your wedding day. Get. A. Tent.” We tried to fight it and I’d be lying if I said we weren’t bummed but you know what? It was totally fine. Nobody cares if you’re in a tent or in a field surrounded by horses grazing on grass while a movie is projected on a wall behind you. It’s not a wedding without some hiccups and you just roll with it.

Danny Douglas catered, serving grilled Tri-Tip, Chicken, and a veggie risotto that made me wish he was my personal chef. Our friend, Graham Palmer, from Sforzando, made the incredible wines and Jeremy selected all of the craft beers from his store, The Oaks Gourmet. We had a couple cakes – one from Flore and one from the Madonna Inn (as a nod to the place where we got engaged). Jeremy’s friend, Genevieve, from Delilah Bakery made us an incredible bourbon banana bread pudding.

We wanted a stagecoach-stop/roadside-dive-bar feel for the reception and our pals that dj’d and played live music really pulled it off. We weren’t going to do a first dance or a bouquet toss BUT as 2AM rolled around, we were dancing to I’m Your Man by Richard Hell and I found myself tossing the bouquet out to the 10+ ladies that were in it for the long haul.

It’s no surprise that when you get married to your best friend, you’re feeling pretty much head over heels in love but, after all was said and done, I think Jeremy and I both had major crushes on all of our friends and family that helped create this incredible day for us.

Editor's Note: Is it inappropriate that I sort of have a crush on the guy with the mohawk? Okay, inappropriate.

Check out the Rad + In Love blog for tons more photos of the magical mayhem. And.... Special bonus.... Jamie + Michelle have another wedding up on 100 Layer Cake today. It's ALL RAD, ALL DAY LONG.