Wednesday, June 1, 2011


i'm having a little trouble focusing this week.

but. there's a new dear esb up on 100 layer cake for you. i think you'll enjoy it. (bonus: the photo is HOT)

image via pneumonia white


  1. Hi ESB, I think this question was submitted to Dear Prudence or Carolyn Hax (both of the Washington Post) this past week. Or maybe it was Cary Tennis (Salon).

    Cary Tennis wrote an article directly addressing this within the last few months. I'll try to find it and repost.

  2. mmmmmmmm. I do love a skinny hairless dude.

    wait, were we supposed to read the post?

  3. @Anon d'you think it was the same bride?? she submitted the motherfucking question to APW too.

  4. what a weirdo for submitting it all over. i assume that she already made a decision in her mind but 1) wants to see what advice she gets and 2) probably has already made a decision, but wants to see how many people side with her.

    WTF though. get some friends to discuss this with...not the whole wedding blog world.

  5. This is the original Anon... sorry, it was APW. I do indeed read too many advice columns. I once wrote in to the NYT Social Q's back in the day, and had an assistant editor call me to promise that I hadn't submitted anywhere else. Too bad there isn't an online clearinghouse for that kind of nonsense!

  6. @Anon okay well that's a relief i guess. ijusthavetobefaster.

  7. Maybe the APW response wasn't ESB enough and she hoped you'd tell her to tell her friends that they're not invited because husband to be doesn't like them. :)

  8. Wow. well, in the comment section of the APW post it became clear that one of the BFF's from high-school is a gay man who makes her FH uncomfortable with his frequent and often audience-inappropriate comments about his sex life. I find it telling that the OP wrote into two columnists but didn't mention this fairly important aspect to either of them, except in the comments later. This was her main example of what her fiance disapproves of.
    It also sounds, based on the fact that her normally involved friends have been radio-silent about her upcoming wedding, like they know they are not liked by the FH and that the feeling is mutual.
    I suspect that there are some deeper politics related to the groom's feelings about overt homosexuality, and that the friends have long since picked up on the vibe.
    If this were my high-school friend, I would hope that she would talk to me, or talk to her groom, specifically about that issue... seriously, instead of talking to every advice columnist online, just talk to the damn people in your life!!!