Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Please help me find a bathing suit!!

Dear ESB,

Next month, I'm getting married and going to South America for our honeymoon in the Andes mountains. This won't be a beach-y vacation by any means, but there will be some occasions to wear a swimsuit (hot springs, and maybe a pool).

I'm an athletic, hourglass size 10 - I am pretty comfortable in my skin and I'm not trying to find a suit that creates the illusion that I stopped drinking beer or eating pie after I got engaged (I did not).

Last spring, I bought one of those Jantzen vintage-inspired one-pieces thinking that hey, finally a suit for the busty pale lady with a small waist. But I bought it in turquoise (because that color was the most discounted) and I am pretty sure it reads matronly and not vintage-hot. Also, I had it hanging to dry in the bathroom and a girlfriend remarked on it and asked (innocently!) if my mom was visiting. I was crushed.

Can you help me out? I don't really care for precious details, no bows. And I would rather show my cellulite than wear a suit with a skirt on it.



Feel like shopping, you guys?

Are there even any suits left now that it's August??

Photo: Jean Patchett by Serge Balkin for Vogue (1950) via myvintagevogue


  1. $30!


    And, I KNOW we aren't supposed to...but J. Crew does have some really great basic one pieces as well.

  2. I know J Crew is off limits, but they have nice one piece swimsuits, and this one is sexy with the deep V:


  3. Urban outfitters has some cute ones on sale now for their end of summer sale:



    but as a brazilian...if your'e gonna be in south america...no matter what your shape you should totally rock a two piece.

  4. These swimsuits are amazing and can be customized to your exact measurements. http://www.etsy.com/shop/minn0wbathers

  5. no specific suits to recommend, but DEFINITELY rock a two-piece in S. America. Otherwise you will look ridiculously overdressed...

  6. the website doesn't do it much justice, but this is the best bathing suit ever! I got mine a few years ago in emerald green. It is so flattering and sucks you in & stays put.



  7. Effffffffff me. I am SO SORRY! I swear to god that that Zimmermann suit was still available in a large when I posted it!

    Norma Kamali has some great stuff.


    And, while it is totally out of my price range, I've always wanted a suit from Malia Mills.


  8. This cover-up says to me "I ran away to South America with my lover."

    This one-piece might seem boring but my friend has it and it's really flattering and sexy.

    This top is vintage-y and looks like it could give good support while looking sexy, and I think it would look cute with these drapey polka-dot bottoms.

    Your honey moon sounds badass!!!!!!

  9. What about something like this Seventh Wonderland number? It has a vintage vibe, but the cutouts give it some modern sexy.

    I also like this one from DSQUARED2.

    Bikini's tend to look good on hourglass figures if they have enough support. Maybe something like this? Or this?

  10. i'm with the two piece for south america too. i'd do it and i just had A BABY 4 months ago. they're not as weird as americans when it comes to body image. there, you can have a normal sized figure and be considered sexy. shocking, i know.

    i am also in the big boobs small waist camp, and i know that makes finding a good suit so difficult.

    ok, i know it's not allowed here, but jcrew does offer most of their suits in d cup. if you're going for vintage-looking, here's a great top...


    ad then, if you're willing to spend the money for a suit that will last you for years to come, try malia mills (also does suits for bustier women). this is the suit i was planning on getting before i got knocked up...


  11. Norma Kamali! Super sexy!


  12. I totally wanted this one when it first came out.

  13. Listen, here's the deal. I'm just going to admit that for some things, I have to shop the lowest common denominator. Like when I need fancy hooker earrings that weigh less than 5lb. Or a bathing suit for my melon-sized tatas.

    So I bought my suit at Walmart. And it fucking ROCKS. Because Walmart people are chubby with big boobs and back fat like me. And they still have them. Which I know because, um, I really needed some hooker earrings this morning and I happened to see suits there.

    This baby sucks you in and keeps the girls at attention, but manages to be really, really comfortable.

    Even if you eat pie. Fuck, especially if you eat pie.

    I bought it in red: http://bit.ly/htCw8i

    But they also have it in leopard. Natch.

    Also, that Jantzen is just going to dig into your shoulders if your boobs are larger than a B-cup.

  14. This is the best time to shop for swimwear. Super sales. As much as I like the retro-maillot trend, I'm a bikini girl. Here are some two-pieces for you:

    Button bikini

    Color blocked bikini

    More "athletic" bikini

    I know you said you're not keen on "precious details;" but I had to include this
    sweet black suit... in case you could make an exception for eyelet.

    Happy shopping. Your honeymoon sounds AMAZING! xo.

  15. please to be buying this. hourglasses are to be SHINY.

  16. Oooh! But if you're going for 2-piece, buy something by Shoshanna. For some reason, her two-pieces are ridiculously comfortable, especially if you're curvier and don't like the feeling of spandex cutting into your hips.


    Personally, I like it in the pink zebra, because I'm a classy broad.

  17. Oh, I posted an eBay link to the one Melissa suggested. But I read the comments and it seems like maybe you should go two-piece. As a slightly body-conscious woman of about your size, I found that in a two piece I like a generously cut bottom (but not boy shorts) and a tube-shaped top with straps.

    JCrew has a lot of these.

    sidenote: I'm all JCrew love, actually - it's where I shop the most. I get ESB dogging on them, though, because everyone suggests them as solutions to wedding fashion dilemmas when a) who hasn't already heard that they do wedding stuff? and b) it's not that great, actually - basic and unimaginitive.

  18. In all seriousness I'd go for something from a store like this. http://toxicsadie.com/home.php?cat=2. You are young. Your flesh is good. Enjoy it.

  19. Or this one. http://www.theorchidboutique.com/tides-embroidery-bikini.html.

  20. if you're an athletic gal who's looking to be hot and comfortable at the same time, then I think this suit is pretty top-notch:


  21. Are you a busty size 10? I am and for years I just figured that L/XL tops were the largest available (I also thought that DD was the largest bra size a gal could find). Then I discovered the company FREYA. Amazing for bathing suits and bras alike. Nothing so special/trendy about their styling, but their suits are classic and MAGIC in terms of fit. Like magic magic.

    I have never purchased a one piece but I assume that they are as amazing as their bikinis. Quick search shows some cute one pieces:



  22. @LPC if you ever say anything about YOUNG FLESH here again, i will block you i swear to god.

  23. If you like vintage style, Revamp does some super-cute reproductions. Their high waisted two pieces cover your tummy without looking like you're ashamed of it.

    Here's a couple cute ones without skirts:



    They also do custom wedding dresses.

  24. I can't recommend this one enough. I'm a busty size 8 to 10 and bought this one on buff pink. I feel sexy, vintage and comfortable all at once, and don't even feel self-conscious about my tummy.

    Have a fantastic time on your honeymoon!


  25. Meant as a compliment and attempt to convey perspective through the smeared and bloody lens that is aging. But blocking would be sad, sad, sad, so you have my word.

  26. @LPC you sound like Buffalo Bill. also: I can't actually block you on blogger.

  27. I totally heart Shabby Apple (http://www.shabbyapple.com/c-55-swim.aspx?pagesize=9999), but I absolutely recommend rocking some hot 2-pieces! Is it terrible that I think of Victorias Secret, like http://bit.ly/nnyAWP - I just love the twist.
    - http://bit.ly/pHwf7n or http://bit.ly/mUSFgX (mm, sparkles! kinda)
    - http://bit.ly/o4s8ZT -- bold pattern!

  28. @LPC From the swimsuit-request-email-writer, the good flesh comment is the most validating thing I've heard in a long time.

    Everyone else, thanks! I think I might go ahead and bare my tummy in Peru. No one there will ever see me again, right? Except the husband, and he is stuck with me due to MARRIAGE.


  29. Laughing. esb has the best blog comment threads on the planet. Have a wonderful honeymoon OP.

  30. PERU!!!! Your honeymoon just got ever badasser in my eyes. I was born there. My parents kind of went on a 12 year long honeymoon/Peace Corps adventure. They claim it was because it was the 80's in America and they had to get away from all the perms and shoulder pads. Enjoy Peru!!!!

  31. I totally agree with the Freya comment. I just purchased a Freya suit (two pieces, ordered separately) from ASOS for my upcoming South American honeymoon. The foldover bikini briefs (though they sound awful) are super flattering on an hourglass figure.

  32. Try http://swimspot.com/ ! The athena brand has a lot of nice suits without any frilly details.

  33. @LPC- that made me spit out my iced tea. I just imagined you saying it in some sort of tarzan voice. you young. flesh good.

  34. Re: Freya suits - Barenecessities has a lot of their Freya suit 50% off right now. Just got one for my September honeymoon to Antigua!

  35. http://www1.bloomingdales.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=533580&CategoryID=15810

  36. I would love to be Tarzan.

  37. ASOS has some really good options. But I always rock the retro suit. Big floppy hat, sunglasses, and some wedges. You'll knock 'em dead!

  38. I have no suggestions, because I'm down under and it's freaking winter down here. But I may use some of these for "winter dreaming tropical holiday", or just when summer arrives here!

  39. I love the shapes they use for Toast swimwear and, as a fellow curvy size 10, tend to find halter bikini tops that tie around the neck the most flattering (and the easiest for getting the right support!)

  40. Splurge on Malia Mills.....it's your honeymoon! And ROCK a bikini while your at it....



    Plus, the suit will last you for years.

  41. Someone else has prolly suggested Toast, but i think they really are the most flattering cut around.
    Its UK website means you would need a UK size 14 for a US10. i like the red one!

  42. Put your size in on the left and have fun choosing: http://www.figleaves.com/us/department.asp?dept=Womens_Holiday_Shop&answerhandle=11397&searchhandle=A%253dholiday%2Bshop%2Bnot%2Bin%2Bolet%257eB%253dholiday%2Bshop%2Bnot%2Bin%2Bolet%257eD%253d12%257eI%253dCurrentPrice%257eK%253d4%257eL%253d1%257eM%253d85%257e&answerhandleback=11397

  43. Second the Esther Williams comment - best swimsuit ever. I guess it could skew matron if you got a mom-ish pattern, but I have the black sheath and the pink sheath with cherry print and feel super hot when I wear them. Which is kind of saying a lot for a swimsuit.

  44. How 'bout a vintage piece?


  45. Um, yikes, I have that exact Jantzen bathing suit. I guess I need to look through all these links before I go off to Vegas in a few weeks. Thanks for saving me, esb & co!