Thursday, April 19, 2012
I am in need of a serious perception check. I hope you can help in my quest to be calm about all of this.
My girl cousin (older than I am by several years) is getting married in the fall. This girl has gotten away with and has gotten what she wanted every single time -- for her entire life. No one has ever put a foot down and told her no. She and the fiancé are in careers in which they earn a significant income. Prominent people will be attending this event. I think that they may have lost touch with reality, but I want to know what you think. Thanks in advance...
Season of wedding: fall. Fall is great: pretty leaves in the Northeast, sweaters, outdoor fire pits, college football, and so on. However, she and her fiancé have scheduled the wedding for -- wait for it -- the weekend of my thirtieth birthday. This cousin knows that this is the weekend of my birthday and that potentially I had plans. We grew up together, and while she and I aren't particularly close, our mothers are-- we do all the holidays as a massive group of her fam and mine, and it is always loud and pretty fun.
So they had the venue, and the only time they could get it was that weekend. Then they changed the venue to a barn located off of some tiny road... in the woods. Picturesque, I get it. Her family will be staying in the cottage area by the barn while all the rest of us have to fend for ourselves. My fam was told that we had to book our own lodging, and that we were not invited to stay with the rest of them.
That's to really okay, but it is okay, however, everything close by is a bed and breakfast. B and Bs skeeze me out. The ones nearby demand a two night minimum, and it will run the BF and me about $400/450. Parents need a room. Brother and GF need a room. That cost does not include other weekend essentials like presents or attire or gas to get there. The closest less expensive place is 20 some minutes down the road. So no drinking at the reception for me. Trust me, there are no taxis there.
No one has been forthcoming about multiple things: rehearsal dinner (are we invited?), time frame (assuming evening?), attire (black tie or casual?).
I want to book a flight to somewhere warm and skip all of it. That would cause a stir, and while I'm not too sure she would care one way or the other if I were there (I have offered to help since Engagement Day 1), I don't know that I feel like dealing with never hearing the end of it at functions-- or driving that huge of a rift into things.
Do I need to suck it up, go to the wedding, and practice slow breathing exercises? Or do I have a little bit of a right to be annoyed?
Considering Flights to the FL Keys
Weddings are expensive.
B+Bs are lovely.
BLAH BLAH BLAH your birthday.
You are being a brat.
Photo by Robert Harper for Playing Fashion April 2012 via Fashion Gone Rogue via Jessica Goldfond