Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Jonathan's Badass Bachelor Party: BBQ, Paintball + Ceremony of Losing One's Nads















The cast of characters:

My brother-in-law Carlos, who is insane, was the demented SOB that planned the party. Although I had plenty of input. The guys who attended were the slime of the earth. The complete underbelly of society. My brother (Captain Jerk) and my soon-to-be-uncle-in-law (Father Costanzo), Luis "the Judge" Gonzales, my friends Tim, Joel, and Mario. Carlos brought a couple of his wacky friends, including a Japanese exchange student called James Bond who barely spoke English and turned out to be a mean shot with a splatter gun. 

The attire:

Those jerk-offs were not allowed on the van without a costume. I wore my bride-to-be's sparkle leggings, a Scottish tartan & a tuxedo top. My evening wear was inspired by a character I used to do back in my acting days. 

The activities:

BBQ breakfastPaintball, The Ceremony of Losing One's Nads at my former bachelor pad. (It was a ceremony to give peace to my penis, one that marked the changing hands of control from myself to my wife.) Afterward, we headed to Tonga Room and to El Compadre. We ended the night at Sam's Hofbrau, as you do.


Photos by Melissa Ryan of Marble Rye.* (Check out more images from Jonathan's bachelor extravaganza here and here.)


*FYIZ: Melissa just launched a #WHYWEDTHEDESERT contest over on her site. If you're planning to get married in Joshua Tree (or might be persuaded to scrap your current plans in order to do so), she wants to take your photos for free.

8 comments:

  1. If this wasn't so insanely awesome, I think I'd be wondering who gets their bachelor party professionally photographed. Now, I might just be grateful, mainly for the shot of the leid underwear-clad piccolo player.

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    1. I want everything in my life professionally photographed. I'm a narcissist.

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  2. I want my bachelorette party to be exactly like this.

    More importantly, any of those dudes single?

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    1. I guess the priest is:P (BTW. Is he a real priest? If so -- he's a pretty rad one)

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    2. A few of them are (unfortunately the "priest" is a married man). Happy to pass on digits, they were a seriously good time.

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  3. Ain't no party without a Japanese foreign exchange student.

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  4. Thanks for the head's up about Marble Rye's Joshua Tree contest, ESB. My partner and I are picking up my ring tomorrow, so this is all quite perfect. What an awesome way to celebrate SCOTUS and love and the desert!

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