WTF should I do with my last name when I get married?
I've read some great posts over at APW about name changing which gave me some good ideas and opinions, but I still can't decide.
I'd love to see what your and your reader's thoughts on the subject are.
Options I’m considering:
-Keeping my name
-Changing my last to his & moving my last name to be part of my middle name
-Keep my name legal and go by his name publicly
Future baby name options:
-All have his last name
-One has my last name, one has his
He doesn’t want to change his name at all (which is understandable because his last name is awesome), so unfortunately we can’t go the route of making up a brand new one. He is also supportive of whatever decision I make.
Reasons to change it:
His last name is seriously awesome, my last name isn’t awesome, it’s easier on kids than hyphenating (which I’m not super stoked on anyway), I’m not super “established” in work/art, I love change/fresh starts & what’s the difference if I take one man’s name (FH) over another man’s (father)?
Reasons to keep it:
It’s MY name damn it, I feel like it’s “anti feminist” if I change it and mostly; I’m really proud of my family which is tiny and I feel like by changing my last name I’m leaving part of me behind (if that makes sense).
A few months after H and I got married, my 13-year-old niece stood next to me at H&M, watching me sign a credit card slip.*
"Wow, I guess you had to learn to sign your name all over again, huh?"
"Nope. I didn't change my name."
"You don't have to change your name?"
"You mean I could keep my name when I get married?"
She's got a great name. She should keep her name. And it blew my mind that she didn't even know this was an option.
I knew from the time I was little that I'd never change my name. I never even CONSIDERED IT. And it makes me crazy when a professed feminist (!) explains that she never liked her last name anyway and/or it was really important to her husband that she change it and/or she wants to have the same last name as her children (my mom and I have different names and WE SURVIVED!).
Makes me crazy.
It's 2013 and we're moving backwards.