Monday, March 11, 2013
umm, did I miss the memo
Soo, let me preface with the - I love your blog and never thought I'd be writing to you, but here am I.
My man and I have been together for 2.5 years and have begun (he has begun, not me) the discussions of marriage etc. In between trying to keep me from leaving the room, while he makes these noises, I have managed to establish the following :
- he wants to get married sooner, rather than later
- he'd like a couple of kids
- he is not religious, but wants me to convert to his religion
- I am not religious, but I don't want to convert for many varied reasons, I don't want kids, I am open to marriage
I have sinking feeling I know the answer to my issue. I possibly just want to hear from someone completely and utterly independent, because its going to suck big time doing this to someone I love, but if our ideas of the future are so different there doesn't seem to be a point in prolonging the agony.
Also, I'm Australian, white as a ghost, with very liberal parents and he is a Pakistani Muslim, with the world's most traditional family background. Although he is the black sheep of the fam, he is the oldest and I have watched him, since his father's death last year, slowly returning to traditional ways and values. We did have a super big argument a couple of months ago about the future, which ending with him saying "but my fucking family expect us to get married, you have to convert and do this."
Any thoughts, or should I keep hitting myself in the head while I try and keep studying for my law degree and working full time.
Rip off the band-aid. (And soon.)
You and I both know this ain't gonna work.
Sojourner Morrell by Arnaud Pyvka for Marie Claire Italia March 2013 via Visual Optimism