another installment of: CREEPY OR AWESOME?

The faces are cut out of Victorian photos, but never fear..... Crystal does custom!

No Brooklyn/Wisconsin Wedding After All...

Hi ESB-

I wrote to you a while back and you gave me excellent, excellent recommendations for my Wisconsin wedding party in Brooklyn. Perhaps you remember. Unfortunately, he walked out on me a month ago for a younger woman, which was three weeks before the wedding. Not to air our dirty laundry or anything, but I would like to let everyone know how courteous both Love & Brain videography and reBar were in returning deposits and wishing me well.

In the ultimate of ultimate revenge/karma/serendipity, the day that word got out about the cancellation, I was offered a job teaching for a study abroad program on a cruise ship next summer. My summer will be spent cruising the Med, and spending 4-day free-for-all trips in Morocco, Turkey, Greece, Italy, France, Malta, etc. etc. You get the picture.

So, I am looking to you for two things from you and your readers (and I hope that no one minds that these are strictly ANTI-wedding needs):

First, and most importantly, swimsuits. I have recently become a size 2 (for the first time ever down from an 8!!), so I would like to wear my first bikini, and I need to be absolutely vicious! The options that I like so far are: Shakuhachi [pictured above] and Plhi, and I would like for it to be under $100 (grad student income).

Second, I'd like to pool some ideas from your travelling readers about inexpensive MUSTS in my port cities (listed here). I also plan to spend a week in England before the trip begins.

Any and all advice is greatly appreciated.

*****

I know you aren't writing in for a pep talk or anything but FUCK THAT GUY AND YOU ARE BETTER OFF. I know you know that.

On to more important things. That Shakuhachi bikini has been sold out ever since Amy Merrick wore it in Tulum........... But I actually dig the etsy one. And I appreciate that Size I is rated to fit a 4-6. (Because, from one woman who has gone through the post-breakup-awesome-weight-loss thing to another, you may go up to a 4 pretty quick. Which is NOT a bad thing.)

So much love to you, lady. Keep on kicking ass.

Seeking: Rehearsal Dinner Dress, Size 16

Dear ESB,

I had a fight with the woman who was making my rehearsal dinner dress and we decided that canceling the order was the best course of action.

She made changes without telling me and then when I asked her to undo the changes, she told me that she would rather sell the dress to someone who would appreciate it.

Anyway, my wedding is about a month away and I am trying to find a dress. I am looking for a reasonably priced (under $200) white lace shift. I am hugely busty and generally wear a 16 everywhere else. I have looked around and not been able to find what I'm looking for in my size.

I was hoping you might have some ideas for me. I ordered a couple of things from ASOS, but they're not quite right. Oh, also I'm 38 and need something age-appropriate, but not frumpy.

Thank you!

*****

DON'T WEAR WHITE TO YOUR REHEARSAL DINNER.

Gah.

Will this peaches and cream Diane von Furstenberg fit you??

Because it is awesome.

trendy vs. timeless

Hey ESB,

I have a family wedding this fall and need some accessory guidance. This is the dress (though I'll be wrapping it a bit differently). I'm pairing it with some sleek pewter pumps I already own and some raw smoky quartz baubles.

The issue is, I'll be toting a rather large vintage camera, phone, yadda yadda yadda -- a clutch isn't going to cut it. Can I rock this bag or am I totally mixing genres?

Sort of unrelated, but I don't have lots of dollars to work with.  For me, this is kind of an investment piece. Wondering where you and your readers would rank it on the trendy/timeless spectrum.

Thanks for your wisdom!

-The Bag Lady

*****

On a scale of trendy (1) to timeless (10), that bag rates a 3. Maybe a 4.

I recently spotted the new Coach "Legacy" Leather Duffle on because im addicted....

which sent me into a 30-minute tailspin searching vintage Coach bucket bags on ebay and etsy.

There are QUITE A FEW. And they are excellent.

This one from Bel Modo is $115, and looks to be in pristine condition.

But shop around, they come in a bunch of different sizes. (And if the seller says "BEST OFFER TAKES IT HOME!!!!" don't be afraid to offer half the list price.)

Antlers, and pom poms, and xerographica! Oh my!

You guys, I'm posting more details than usual on this one because GAAAAAAAAH. 

Here's what Kelly had to say about her cool-ass California wedding:

Mike and I are both very untraditional, so from the beginning we knew we wanted our wedding to be unique, whimsical, and just a freaking good time. We were both so excited to be able to have all of our family and friends in one room for the first time ever. Being both midwest transplants, Mike and I wanted to give our family and friends a true California experience to show them why we fell so in love with it out here. 

After months of searching for the perfect outdoor venue, we stumbled upon the Carondelet House. When we walked in, there was no discussion, we knew this was the place. It had history (was actually the old Otis building), amazing architecture, and also had amazing outdoor areas. The space itself was so beautiful that we did not have to do much to it. Once we found the venue, everything else just fell into place.

Mike and I wanted the decor to reflect the fact that this was a celebration and we wanted to bring the fun. We knew we wanted things to be festive and modern since the venue was really rustic. Gold was a must. We worked with Jihan Zencirli from Gironomo Balloons as well as Confetti System for the rest of the gold decorations. All of my friends helped with the planting, making of terrariums, and setting up the day of. 

I designed my dress myself and had it made by an amazing dressmaker in Koreatown. [Dets to follow in a separate post.] My best friend, Jeff Millbern of Banner Year, made a wood, crystal, and pyrite brooch for my dress as well as wood bracelets and pins for each of the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Mike and I chose wood to go along with our wooden wedding rings which were made by Gustav Reyes of Simply Wood Rings. 

With my background in visual merchandising and costume design, and Mike's background in graphic design, we were able to do pretty much everything ourselves...no wedding planner needed! Had we not have had 125 people, I would have wanted to do the food as well! [Kelly has a food blog on the side.] For food, we ended up using Tres LA to do the catering. We kept the menu simple with a cheese and cocktail reception, tacos for the main event, and late night appetizers that included sliders, burrata grilled cheese, fried mac and cheese balls, buffalo style cauliflower, and most importantly, a full bar. 

Our cake was a gift from Mike's employer, the LA Weekly, and was from Rosebud Bakery. We also served red velvet cupcakes from Lark Cake Shop and Earl Grey Macarons from Bottega Louie for dessert. We ordered the invitations from 2 Be U Design on Etsy, and Mike was able to make the programs and menus to correspond with them. The ex-cheerleader in me had to have pom poms and I found some from Spiritline that we used as favors. 

Neither Mike and I are big fans of flowers, so we decided to use airplants and lots of potted succulents as at home, we love to be surrounded by plants. Each bridesmaid held a large xerographica. We purchased everything from the flower market downtown and because we used so many plants, we were able to prep everything weeks earlier. 

Our amazing photographers, Rad and In Love, helped us to set up our photo booth and I can say that was definitely a crowd pleaser. We were married by one of our best friends and walked down the aisle to Neutral Milk Hotel, In the Aeroplane Over the Sea. My favorite part was the swaying of my bridesmaids to this song as I came down the aisle. Our DJ was the amazing Bennett Schmid from Ameoba and he played all old school 80s, 90s, and hip hop.  People are still talking about how great the music was.

Overall, the day was absolutely perfect, but everything went by so quickly... wish we could do it all again! We could not have made it so perfect without all of our amazing friends and family who helped us put it all together. It was definitely a collaboration and celebration of love. We will remember it always.

Photos by Rad + In Love. Check out tons more from Kelly + Mike's wedding over on the Rad + In Love blog!

MANPOLL: The (Bedtime) Romper

A reader just emailed me seeking suggestions for wedding night/honeymoon lingerie. She provided a few examples of things she likes, 2 out of 3 of which are rompers.

I was all ready to tell her "STOP LOOKING AT ROMPERS. MEN DON'T LIKE ROMPERS." But then I thought, maybe I should collect a little more evidence.


Ladies, pls drag your menfolks over and make em vote.

You know, for science.

(Pictured above: La Fee Verte Romper + Play With Me Romper)

Is a LAUREL WREATH the new flower crown?

(Jose Villa for Once Wed)

(Ancient Grecian Crown, Museum of Fine Arts Houston via TeenAngster)

Alison is getting married in this one from Pippa Tree. Lucky lady.

OMGEE

A lil present for your flower girl?

Wait. I don't believe in flower girls.


Shit. Scratch that.

dappled doe by oh, albatross via Melissa de la Fuente

Lovely Spanish wedding gowns

Otaduy on Etsy via Allison

Vow renewal on top of Machu Picchu

So I got married almost a year ago, and to celebrate our first anniversary we're heading to Peru to hang out in the Amazon and amongst the Inca ruins.

Now I can guess in advance you're against renewal ceremonies, but hey I love this man insanely, and want to tell this guy I love him all over again. I've arranged a little renewal ceremony up on top of the mountain where Machu Picchu is with a shaman.

What the hell do I wear to this?

*****

Yeah. Like I said over here, a vow renewal implies -- to me -- that someone has broken a vow.

But that's not my biggest problem with your plan.

Here's the bigger problem: Unless you have an actual connection to Peruvian/Andean culture, "arranging a little ceremony" to coincide with your vacation strikes me as an asshole move. 

I mean, a pair of atheists or Jews or fucking METHODISTS would never be permitted to get married (or renew their vows) in a Catholic church, right? So why is it cool to just waltz into Peru and hire a shaman?

Should you insist on going forward with this, tribal hats may be purchased on etsy.

Vintage Goddess Dress

Our romping Canadian just sent this my way (for those of you who were lusting after her dress).

From FabGab on etsy

I WANNABE USCHI

dear esb.

i love the golden rolling stones era and would like to go for a look a la anita pallenberg [image 1], bianca jagger, uschi obermaier [image 2] with a modern twist. in reality, I have no clue where to look. I don't seem to be able to find something I like.

maybe genius esb or her adorable readers have some ideas ?

I attached some photos. I am a medium size if that matters, like my legs and decollete - my waist not so much, have blonde wavy hair. we're going to elope (with family) and surprise our friends with an invitation to a wild party afterwards.

THANK YOU <3
Wannabe-Uschi ;)

PS, feel free to correct my bad english

*****

Here's hoping you are SMOKING HOT, my dear wannabe.* That is going to be the key ingredient.

A few ideas for dresses

Clockwise: Vintage Josefina Gauze Gown, Lover Ivory Wiccan Dress (also avail here), Vintage 70s Halson, Erin Fetherston Wrap Dress. 

Two of these were reader suggestions over here -- you might want to check out all the comments.

______________________________

*Have you read/listened to the Keith Richards book? Speaking of men with SMOKING HOT taste in women.

WELL HELLO THERE

Howzabout this light grey chiffon dress (with metallic thread!) from Holly Stalder?

$325!

rainbow dream wedding

Check out Rin + Joe's Handmade Wedding post that just went up on etsy.

They're so fucking adorable you want to HATE THEM but you can't hate them because they're so fucking adorable.

Also: SNO CONES

Eric Ronald took the gorg photos, and there are tons more up on his blog here and here.

paper flowers, EFF YEAH

Francis & Francis, I like your style.

via Jennifer Hagler via Kate @ Wit + Delight